Short on wedding, long on party.

The details are coming back to me, now...

2006-11-20T18:43:00.000-08:00

For those who want the blow-by-blow account of the week...here it is!

WHAT. A GREAT. WEEKEND!

But oh, my god, the work it took to get there. And, um, the work it’ll take you to read this sucker. If you make it all the way through, you’re a trooper.

And for those who prefer short stories to novels: The weather was perfect the whole week before, everyone who said they’d come came, no one crashed, there was no drama and nothing went wrong. It was perfectly perfect. Best part…hard to pick just one thing, but I did love when the Royal Kephanie Kazoo Orchestra, with ukuleles, played When I’m 64. That was pretty cool. What I would have done differently…I’d have taken off work from the Wednesday on. Taking off just one day before the weekend was frankly stupid. However, it all went off without a hitch (except the intended one) in the end.

Now, for you long recap lovers…

The weekend before

We have an incredibly packed schedule. Kravitz, one of my attendants, throws a wine shower for us, which is super-awesome. But before it and afterward, we run around like crazy, getting furnishings for the new room (which still isn’t quite finished at this point), cleaning the rest of the renovation-messy house and generally trying to make things nice for the wave of incoming guests. Saturday night, a good friend has a major CD release party. We go, and she makes us dance in front of everyone because we’re engaged. Good, but embarrassing, times. Sunday, second verse, same as the first, but throw in a rehearsal of our kazoo orchestra, plus an old friend I haven’t seen in years who happens to be in town and drops by for tea. By day’s end, my eyes are like spirals, because…

Monday night
…my mother and sister arrive, and are staying with us, and the house still looks like a bomb went off in it, and their rooms are nowhere near ready. But they are super cheerful about the state of me, Kevan and the house in general. They bring The Dress with them, and it is everything I could have wanted it to be. It fits slightly snug, but we think with the right bra, that’ll be taken care of. So we ooh and ahh over that for a while. We eat the lasagne I tried to make a day ahead, but ended up putting together on the fly after work. And we play Boggle till a million o-clock, which is roughly when Kevan manages to move his drums out of what is normally his music room, but is to be my mom’s room for the week. Good times. Did I already say that?

Tuesday through Thursday
I continue to freak out. Somehow, the renovation gets finished. One coat of chocolate brown epoxy on the new concrete floor, some high baseboards, and the new room looks amazing. You’d never guess that a month earlier, it had been rotting off its foundation. Realistically, the floor needs to cure for three days, but um, that ain’t happening. Kevan moves all the furniture in, decorates the room beautifully, and we hope for the best.

During this time, I have many, many small freakouts. The to-do list looms large, and I just don’t have the time. Kevan is fixated on the backyard and doing some big project to it; I am determined that we focus on the interior of the house. Eventually, after I cry in the basement one morning because I am so frustrated, we figure out how to row in the same direction, and things go much more smoothly after that. Also, Wednesday night, Kevan’s brother and sister-in-law arrive, and they totally take over the care and feeding of the house. I mean, sis-in-law even washes my floors for me. They are my new favourite relatives. Most out-of-towners are in town at this point, and our house is the main hang-out space, which is both awesome and awful. It is so amazing to see everyone in one place. But we never have a moment to ourselves, and I am constantly called on to make decisions about stuff about which I simply don’t care. I do the best I can. I develop a sore throat that never really goes away. Thursday night, my mom, sister, cousin, sister-in-law, aunts and friends gather at our place to wrap our bombonniere (fancy Italian word for favours): two gourmet chocolates from the farmers’ market. We wrap them in green and ivory tissue paper and then in cellophane and tie them with chocolate brown ribbon. They are cute, and I don’t care if they’re all uniform or anything because, hello, it’s not like people are going to compare them to each other. It takes me roughly half an hour to explain to the assembled (except my sister and mother, god love them) that I actually don’t care exactly how they do them. “But they have to be perfect,” an aunt insists, “you have to take control!” Somehow, we reach an understanding, and the wedding sweatshop commences. It is the last project to complete, and I am damn glad at the end of the night to have had such amazing help.

Friday
I take the day off work. Finally! I’m entitled to five days matrimonial leave, and really wanted to have the week after the wedding off, but in retrospect, I probably should have taken a couple days before the wedding off, too. In any event, Friday. I have achieved a kind of serenity. The to-do list is totally under control. Many, many people are helping, and anyway, there is a sense of inevitability. If it’s not done by now, it probably doesn’t matter much.
Friday night, I take a gang of out of towners to the Shore Club in Hubbards for the lobster supper. So fun. The weather is incredibly beautiful, which you can’t always count on in Halifax, the drive is beyond scenic, and it feels so good to just relax with family and have a blast. Meanwhile, back at the house, Kevan’s stag party is underway. Road hockey in front of the house, then lobsters and burgers for all. When I get home from Hubbards, it’s CHAOS. Lobsters bubbling away, beer everywhere, the kitchen an unholy mess. I do a little damage control, then say what the hell and crack a beer. Our excellent friends across the street brewed a hundred beers for us as a wedding gift. They are delicious. I relax with one of those while the party rages on.
Eventually, the party moves down to Gus’s Pub, a very divey bar directly across the street from our venue. Kevan has a gig there, so we all go see him play. It is insane. Awesome. He’s on fire, the crowd consists of half his friends and our guests, and half drunk old man nutters, who heckle like crazy. One guy sketches him from afar, and gives him the charcoal drawings afterward. It is super super fun. I roll home around 1am, while the fellas head downtown to party harder.

Saturday
We get up early and head to the farmers market, as is our habit. This is where most of our vendors are…we pick up our guest book (we photocopied the pages of I Like You, by Sandol Warburg and enlarged them, then had them bound into a book which is simply gorgeous) and flowers, two boxes of oysters for the rehearsal party, a comb for my hair. In addition to do wedding errands and digging the farmers market scene, we are also tour-guiding a handful of guests. Plus, we end up running into more out of town friends. Ah, the farmers market. Highlight of the weekend…well, besides the wedding, that is.
I make the executive decision to cancel a luncheon that was not coming together as neatly as it should have, and that honestly, none of us really had time to attend anyhow. Doing so makes me feel incredibly liberated.
Rest of the day…manicures and pedicures with mom, sister and Kravitz. Enforced relaxation and lots of fun. Highly recommended. Otherwise, we probably would have just been mindlessly busy all day. This was a great way to unwind with my closest women.
Then we checked the last few things off the list…banged together a playlist, for instance.
Then, suddenly, rehearsal. A few snafus in terms of time, but otherwise, it went well. Then back to the house for the big Italian dinner my mom cooked for everyone. It was cool and weird to watch our parents hang out together, and then after supper, we opened the house to everyone…out of town guests, extended family, neighbours. Kevan and his brother shucked oysters (earning them the name the brother-shuckers), more people nagged us about having kids (what the hell? Let us get married first, at least!), friends I hadn’t seen yet showed up and we all had a blast. By midnight, everyone was gone, and we collapsed into bed.

Sunday. The day!
We got up cheerful to a gorgeous sunny day and headed up the street to our favourite restaurant for brunch, along with mom, sister and Kravitz. We drank mimosas and had a great time.
Back at the house, our good friend T arrived to give us wedding day massages. This was incredible. So relaxing, and a great way to spend time with someone I don’t get to see very often. When I came downstairs after mine, everyone was gone. Kevan was upstairs for his massage, mom and sister had checked into their hotel and the house was quiet for the first time all week. That’s when I noticed the butterflies that had taken up residence in my belly. I wandered around the house, assembling stuff to take to the venue. But I was pretty distracted and ended up mostly just looking out the window. I felt devastatingly calm and thorougly excited.
When T was done massaging Kevan (so cute, with the blissed out expression and sticking up hair!), she and her sister dropped me off at the venue with the bombonniere and assorted other stuff. The venue, of course, is also where I get my hair done, which I was also there for. I sat in the chair and Fred, who was also gloriously calm, got out the big curling iron and started in on me. Kravitz and my sister showed up before long for hair and makeup. With big wedding curls in place, I took orders for sushi, and then Kevan and I headed downtown, but not beffore discovering that our car had been broken into, our Sears card, bridge tokens, ipod broadcaster and phone charger stolen. Huh. Oh well. Who cares, we’re getting married in two hours! We drove downtown, picked up the sushi, withdrew cash for the band, ran into a friend who said, “hey, what are you doing out here?” Such a funny moment, as if I should have rightly been sequestered away in some bridal castle, but got caught sneaking out for supplies. Everything felt magic. The air felt magic.
Things got serious back at the house. We ate sushi, though I could barely eat. I looked at the bucket of flowers I’d bought at the market the day before and thought, hmm, I should probably figure out how to make bouquets and boutonnieres. Huh. I got to work on those. Fortunately, my whole it-doesn’t-have-to-be-perfect thing was really working for me. I ended up putting together three of the bouquets our flower seller had assembled, wrapping the stems in florist tape and winding ribbon around it for myself, doing the florist tape and ribbon number on two more bouquets, one for my sister and one for Kravitz, and pulling out three good looking stems for boutonnieres for Kevan and his brothers. They were…charming, rather than elegant, and they were perfect and I loved them.
Then suddenly, it was time to get dressed. My sister worked on steaming my dress, while I put on my 556 dollars worth of expensive underwear (bra and matching underpants. Five hundred and fifty six dollars! But they made me look like a million bucks, so I guess it was a good deal) and stood around waiting. My mom was in the house, getting ready, too. Kravitz was there, and Kevan’s brothers and his youngest brother’s girlfriend. I couldn’t wait to put the dress on and get down to the business of marrying Kevan. He, meanwhile, was discovering his shirt needed ironing. Bounded down the stairs to the basement ironing board, bounded back up, bursting into the bedroom just as Kravitz had her pants off, to get her dress on. I shielded her with my crinoline, and eventually, we were all dressed.
Down the stairs, to admiring noises from new BILs. Had to ask youngest not to speak for a few minutes, as my mind somehow required silence and stillness. Finally, it was time to walk.

The evening was cool and clear, with a full moon. The venue – a salon/café/gallery is about a ten minute walk from our place, so we set off at a leisurely pace. I loved the parade of us, in our wedding finery, walking down the street together. As we approached the venue, the Sinister Minister came out to check in with us. It’s likely he told us to wait a few minutes before we headed in so he could let the crowd know and get them make a path for us. In the video my sister in law took, you can see Roy talking to us, and me nodding like I understand what he’s saying. Soon as he went back into the venue, we started walking in. Heh. Slight chaos.

We entered to cheers and hoots and hollers. The venue looked amazing, all candle-lit and gorgeous. Our friends and family also looked amazing, everyone dressed up, with fancy hair and happy looks on their faces. The first wave of affection rolled over us. We stood at the doors for sometime, waiting for the go sign from Roy. People snapped photos of us furiously. Red carpetly. Our music was supposed to be Her Majesty, by the Beatles, but we couldn’t hear it. Others could though, so I think we were just overwhelmed. And finally, we were walking down the aisle OH MY GOD. So fun.
We got married in front of four super-colourful paintings. The ceremony was exactly what we wanted it to be. Funny and sincere and totally us. We took our time and really relaxed in it. Our vows drew huge laughs. We also made the assembled friends and families make a few vows of their own. People loved it.

After we signed the required paperwork (on a clipboard, using each other’s backs for support), the Royal Kephanie Kazoo Orchestra played When I’m 64 and it was so hilariously awesome, I was as thrilled by it as if it had been a surprise, rather than something we pulled together. What was unexpected, and totally lovely, was that everyone else there sang along. Such a fabulous moment.

Three toasts afterward, and then we slipped away to the salon side for a few photos. Meanwhile, the party raged around us. The gypsy jazz band started sometime later, and people freaked out and danced all night. Every time we danced together, people applauded. Kevan thought they were just clapping for the band, but no, it was for us. When the cupcakes were wheeled out, people leapt on them, and devoured them. It was a cupcake free-for-all. The food was amazing, the band was fantastic, and everyone had a super time, including and especially us. When the gypsy jazz band took a break, one of the bands Kevan plays with set up and played a few songs, which was also great, and people danced to that music, too.

Around 1am, I gathered up everyone who remained, and paraded them back to our place, where we ate pizza, drank some more of those homemade beers and generally made merry till at 3am we sent everyone home and made our way up to bed, where there was indeed consummation, exhaustion be damned! And then we slept a few hours till they all came back one more time to our place for a fabulous brunch thrown by Kevan’s Dad and Shirley.

We brunched, we opened presents, we packed off a bit more family, we ate Chinese food with those who remained. We took a minimoon to Hubbards and stayed in a lovely cottage with some old friends. We packed the last of them off on Thursday afternoon, stood in the silence of our marital home for the first time since we got married and just smiled at each other.

It was a week that felt like a month but also felt like a minute. It was the hardest week I’ve had in a while, maybe ever, but in the end it was oh, so easy. Best decision of my life, appropriately celebrated with the most incredibly party we could imagine.

So, how was YOUR Thanksgiving?

2006-10-17T16:39:00.000-07:00

Ours was FANTASTIC, thanks to about a hundred and thirty of our closest friends and family.

Best. Weekend. EVER. We loved seeing each and every one of you...even the ones of you we barely got to see. If that includes you, please come visit us soon! We will make you dinner!

We've seen a few digital photos from the big night, including this awesome project you may have been part of, put together by one of our favourite Winnipeglians, Iris Yudai.

If you have photos of the night to share, please send them our way. We would love to see our party through your lens. We'll set up a flickr site, as well, so that anyone who's interested can take a look.

A frillion, zillion thank yous, to everyone who helped make our night so perfectly perfect. And, in case you're wondering, nine days in, married life suits us just fine. In fact, so happy with it are we that we fall asleep each night on the couch around 9pm. That's what married folks do, right?

Wasn't that a party!

2006-10-07T21:03:00.000-07:00

Well, it's after midnight here, and the preliminary tidy-up has been performed after the raucous rehearsal dinner-cum-house party. A fine time was had by all. Home brews were consumed, oysters were shucked, babies were passed around and the Habs beat the Leafs. I have to admit, that last part? Yeah, that wasn't my favourite part.

But it was super awesome to have our families meet each other, and to be surrounded by them all night long, and to have so many good friends close by, especially those from far away. We are so lucky to know such great people!

We are off to bed now, at last, at last. A few last minute tasks to do tomorrow...things involving flowers, mainly. Our good friend Tanya is giving us wedding massages, hurray!

Next time we see you, we'll be getting married!

So, what are you doing on the weekend?

2006-10-01T05:09:00.000-07:00

The soundtrack in my head these days is The Final Countdown. You'll all be with us in a week, which feels at once like an eternity and a single beat in a bad eurotrash anthem.

Ah, eurotrash.

But I digress. There won't be any eurotrash to be heard on Friday, October 7 at Gus's Pub in Halifax. Kevan's playing there, starting around 10pm. It's right across the street from FRED. The show is the middle part of Kev's bachelor party, so if you want to see a bunch of his pals all primed for a night on the town, that'll be the place to be.

But the evening's festivities actually start quite a bit earlier. If you're the lobster-eating type, join the lobster caravan heading to the Shore Club in Hubbards for the lobster supper. It's around 25 bucks for a small but satisfying lobster, plus all the mussels and salads you can eat, plus dessert, which is often blueberry grunt, which is very good indeed and if you've never tried it you really should. Hubbards is about a 40-minute drive from town, and if you want to go but don't have a car, let us know...a bunch of us are heading out and we should be able to fit you in somewhere. They start serving those lobsters at 4pm...we'll be leaving Halifax around that time, and we should be sitting down with lobster bibs on by 5pm. We'll see you there, we hope! Then the party moves back to town and over to Gus's Pub, and from there, who knows?

Saturday morning, we will be at the Farmers' Market, doing some last minute errands, drinking coffee and generally getting our heads on straight. We're hoping to head there by about 8am...Kev may be unslept and unwashed, but that's ok, the coffee there is strong.

Saturday night, join us at our place if you like, after 9pm, for a drink and some sweets and some meeting and greeting.

And then Sunday. Oh, Sunday! Plan to be at FRED by 7pm. We'll see you there at 7:30 to get married and for general merriment.

Monday morning, if you're not sick of us, we'll be at home for brunch from about 11:30 till around 1pm. Drop by if you fancy some coffee and baked breakfast treats before you leave town.

We'll try to update once more this week, but things might get pretty crazy...the first wave of out of town guests arrives tomorrow night!

Maps and marketing

2006-09-28T19:07:00.000-07:00

Wow, a week today, so many of you will be here with us already! We are in the homestretch now, and that feels great. The house is a mess, but the wedding plans are totally under control. And hey, we still have four days before my mom arrives...plenty of time to put things right!

We've decided to send Sparky, our cantankerous ten-year-old cat, off to the Cat Nap Inn for most of the week. He'll be happier without so much disruption, and I'm hoping that our house becoming a cat-free zone will mean that my brother and his wife and baby daughter will be able to stay with us, which will be great. Little Emily Ray just took her first steps yesterday, so I imagine she'll be cutting a rug to the gypsy jazz band at the wedding next week.

The wedding next week. Oh, my!

And speaking of the wedding...here's a handy map to where the whole thing will go down!

And while we're at it, here's one to our place!

If you're going to be in town on Saturday morning, you should think about coming to the farmers' market. That's where Kev and I spend each Saturday morning, and October 7 will be no different. We'll be there, drinking coffee and eating breakfast on the steps, picking up some fresh Nova Scotia produce, and getting my bouquet for Sunday's festivities. We'd sure love to see you there.

Parking and painting

2006-09-24T05:17:00.000-07:00

Two weeks to go.

We made some good progress yesterday, checked a few things off the to-do list. There's not much left, now! My dress has arrived, though not here -- my mom and sister have it in their care, in Ontario. I won't get to see it till October 2, when they arrive in Halifax. Hope it fits! Heh.

If you're planning to drive to the wedding, you'll be glad to know that we've arranged for parking at the Liquor Commission on Agricola Street. It's just a few steps from Fred, and their lot tends to be empty on Sunday nights. The manager there said it would be just fine with them if all y'all parked there during our party. So feel free!

Keep in mind though, the venue is just a couple blocks from the hotels, and a cab ride wouldn't run you more than five or six dollars.

In other news, the struggle to get the house ready continues. Today...operation paint the hallway. Off to mix the paint...

Heaven 17!

2006-09-21T18:03:00.000-07:00

Seventeen days and counting, folks! We are beyond excited. We are also beyond busy and beyond exhausted. But it's all good...it helps us block out the whole Rolling Stones hysteria that is currently gripping Halifax (don't worry, it'll all be over by the time you get here).

The wedding preparations are well in hand. A few details left to complete -- you know, rings, license, that kind of thing. But even those technicalities are underway...the rings are at the caster's, and we can pick up the license tomorrow. Kev's suit is at the tailor's, my dress is finally ready (though I won't see it till Mom and Donna arrive here on October 2), and I am breaking in my wedding shoes as I type this. (I'm quite a sight these days, doing housework in yoga pants and my Oscar de la Renta shoes. Very fabulous.)

An exciting development...Kev is playing at Gus's Pub on Friday, October 6. Gus's is a smokey joint across the street from Fred, where we will be partying with you shortly. If you're in town on the Friday night, and you can put up with the smoke, we'd be very happy to see you at Gus's.

On Saturday, October 7, if you're around, drop by our place for a drink and some sweets after 9pm. You can email us for directions to our place. We can't wait to show off our new room! (Yes, it's actually done in time for the wedding--we have the world's best contractor!)

And finally, if you're around on Monday, October 9, stop by our place for brunch between 11:30 and 1. Nothing too fancy, but there'll be plenty of baked goods and light brunchy items and delicious coffee to be had.

Oh my gosh, you guys. SEVENTEEN DAYS.

Twenty-nine!

2006-09-09T07:50:00.000-07:00

Twenty-nine days to go, that is! Oh my, the countdown stage is fun! Four weeks from today, our families will get together for the first time ever...so exciting! And four weeks tomorrow....duh-duh-duhhhhh, we get hitched!

I am using up my lifetime allotment of exclamation points these days. After October 8, I will be cut off, for sure.

I was thwarted in my attempt to get a trim and discuss possible wedding hairstyles with Fred today. Some screw-up with the schedule. I guess if I were going to be a stressed-out bride, that would have been a place to start (what do you MEAN I can't see my hairstylist RIGHT NOW????? Don't you know my SPECIAL DAAYYYYYY is just around the corner???), but I looked out the window and thought, huh, nice day. It'd be great not to spend it at the hair salon. All apologies, they made me another appointment, for a week before the wedding. They were quite ginger with me, as if I might go off at any second, but I just shrugged and said, yeah, that'll be just fine. Because really? It's hair. And mine always looks the same, no matter what I do. No reason to think October 8 will be any different.

And so we are coasting along, quite quickly, toward being married. The renovation in the backyard is proceeding apace, which is also very exciting. This morning at the farmers' market, we got plenty of matrimonial business accomplished: we had a quick chat with Hannah, she of the marvelous garden that will furnish forth my wedding flowers. She promised to save the very best dahlias for me on October 7. She also helped us solve our guestbook conundrum, which is super great. We also stopped by our favourite chocolatiere (what, you don't have one at your local market?) and ordered our bomboniere...lavendar chocolates, and her new flavour, Irish coffee. Mmmmm. We ordered a few extra. Hee! And then, marketing done, we zipped up to Barrington Street and made the fastest-ever shoe purchase...a pair of chocolate-brown Chuck Taylor high-tops; Kev's wedding shoes.

So. With those things taken care of, and our rings finally ordered, AND some progress made on our vows, we're starting to be very ready indeed. We'll have to get our license, this week maybe. And I really should be practising hanging out in my wedding shoes. They're not super-high or anything, but since I'm really more a barefoot girl...well, it's going to take some practise. Kev needs to get his pants tailored a bit, and I need to find a back-up alterationist in case my dress needs a few nips or tucks when it gets here in October. But it will all happen in good time.

Now, I'm off to enjoy this gorgeous day. Hope you're doing the same, wherever you are!

Better off wed

2006-08-25T15:50:00.000-07:00

Not too much to report these days on the wedding planning front, except that we are both getting VERY EXCITED about our party, and getting to see so many people we love. I just cannot wait for all those worlds to start colliding!

Speaking of worlds doing crazy kinetic things, the nice handyman men came and cut off the main floor of our house the other day. My study, which is on the second floor, is now being held up by four hardy toothpicks. It boggles the mind. Hopefully we won't get any stiff breezes in the backyard (*hums loudly to distract self from thought of second floor study simply detaching from house and smashing to smithereens in the backyard lalala I can't hear you*). Heh. But we are strangely charged up about the changes to the backyard. It's such an unbelievable mess back there...a big pile of dirt and rock, bigger than you can imagine, and of course a matching hole in the yard, with the aforementioned toothpicks and, new today, the beginnings of a new foundation. It doesn't look like much yet, but boy howdy, when the planets align and it all comes together, well, it'll be about the most spectacular room ever.

It's a little like the wedding...if you'll pardon my obsessive need to relate ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US OR ANYONE ELSE to wedding planning. I mean, there are all these disparate elements right now that are kind of jumbled up in my head, on my computer and in little bags throughout the house. But sometime over the next 45 or so days, they are all going to come together into a pretty incredible party. And then, after that, we'll be married. Talk about spectacular.

Anyhow. What's left on our list right now is the mostly official stuff...rings, vows, finalising the ceremony and picking up the license. This is the good stuff! Planning the party is super fun, but it's when we get down to the meat of articulating why we want to take this leap of faith with each other, well, that's when I start to get really pumped. We have a long car trip coming up, next weekend, to Boston...might be a good time to hammer out those vows. Though they could all end up being things like, I promise to empty the carbage every time we stop for gas or I promise to let you listen to Rush Limbaugh without getting uptight or I promise I will not speed excessively while you are asleep and think I can get away with it. Good solid promises, but not exactly transferable to every day situations.

RSVP's have started to come in, and that is more exciting than I can properly articulate. Just one more thing that makes the whole getting-married caper seem a little more tangible. We are so honoured and delighted with every acceptance, and for those who can't make it, know that we will certainly feel you there in our hearts on October 8. And if you haven't dropped us a line yet to let us know if you'll be there in person or in spirit, we're really looking forward to hearing from you!

I wear the pants. And, the apron.

2006-08-04T07:19:00.000-07:00

Dear readers, hello. I'm Kev, your Snuffleupagian and eager groom. Let me know if I can get you anything.

So let's see, what's new? I see it's been a month since Her Majesty posted (*cough*... bridal chat... *cough*... addict... *wheeze*), so, I guess there's a fair bit to report. (Ahem...)

First, we drove to Montreal and helped some friends elope during JazzFest, so the air had a fairly nuptual whiff to it from the get-go. But then, Montreal's for lovers, n'est-ce pas? The Shower was held at the Ancestral Palace on the 10th, and Her Majesty was, yea verily, showered with wonderful stuff, and we are both grateful beyond measure.

It was, in fact such a success that a few of you have scolded that our registry's almost all bought up. Which is really to say that we hadn't picked a whole lot out.

Mea Culpa, kids. Sometimes we just don't know what to do about registering, for manifold reasons. Most of which you'd guess and which many of you have felt: we're in our thirtysomethings, got a pretty full house, trying to wean 'stuff' out a bit, not getting married for the gifts, fire the evil wedding business, blah blah. And in discussing it with more pragmatic people, we've heard the rationale: Look, people want to buy you stuff, and nobody wants it to be stuff you don't want. And my inner hippie goes for a Starbucks, muttering, and wondering if everyone else here is (over)processing all this as well. Folkies. We're earnest, for better or worse.

Anyway. Pragmatism. We've picked out everything we need that Sears has, so we're now farming it around and basing our choices on what we really do need. We've booked an appointment at Home Outfitters for Monday, Future Shop doesn't have a registry, but they do have gift cards. We'd also be delighted to receive gift cards from Home Depot or Canadian Tire. And that's mostly because of The Room.

(Sidebar, long story short: last year we moved the kitchen from the back of the house - an awful room, crooked, small, dark, and inefficient - to the centre. The plan was and is to tear out the old kitchen with its crooked, drafty floor, insulate the walls (which are, to be fair, 100-odd years old), make a nice little den to spill out onto the back yard. Under the floor, though, the reason for this cited crookedness: foundational collapse. And thus, rotten walls. Mmmm, them funky old houses, that's why we love'em. It had been sitting like that probably for 50 years, and our contractor commented that it was probably the heat loss that saved us from frost heaving like an accordeon. They call it a can of worms, and it is, but I'm taking the view that worms are fish bait.

I call it lucky. It made us act, even if the estimate is scary. And it IS scary, but fixing it will make it genuinely better, for us and for whomever eventually buys the place from us. And if the real estate activity up and down our street is any indication, that won't be a problem, if we ever decide to get out of the city.

So, for all you Real Renos-type armchair contractors, the plan: beam the second floor up, take out the two rotten exterior walls and excavate the floor like drilling out a cavity, pour a proper foundation, infloor heating slab, then frame the walls back in and finish the rest as we can afford. Oooo, good times. But y'know, I figure the cut in the oil bill alone - current value trends and all - and the modernization of the back will save us more than we spend, and ultimately complete the lower floor of the house. )

So to finish up the trip, there was much merrymaking and family time, a surprise visit from my brother Dan and his beloved, many many many questions about babies (we're ambivalent; might happen, might not, dunno, not worrying), reunions with old friends, and I played some great shows around TO. Her Majesty is positively agog with her new dress, currently being made by our dressmaker friend and my drum student, Christine Deuerlein. Always on the lookout for comfort clothes, we turfed the vintage suit idea, and I've gone Linen. The invites are mostly sent or pending addresses, the band's booked, all plans in place. It's a go.

Certain things are a stressout, yeah. But, hey, that's what marriage is. You get through it together, and she's all the foundation I need.

People all over the world, join hands...on the wedding train!

2006-07-03T07:22:00.000-07:00

Whew. T-minus-three months, or coming up on it, anyhow. We're chipping away at our Big Wedding List of Stuff To Do. Our invitations have been sent out to the printer, and should be in the mail in a few weeks. We've made contact with the very talented artist who's making our rings, and we plan to check in with her again in August. We're deep in the work of writing our ceremony and vows, which is both more fun and way more challenging, than anything else in this whole wedding-planning lark.

And on Wednesday, we'll be packing up the car and heading to Toronto for a few weeks' vacation. We'll also do a bunch of wedding stuff while we're up there. My sister is throwing a shower for me next Sunday, which is really exciting and also kind of...strange. It's like, we've been planning this wedding and thinking about the wedding and talking about the wedding, but the shower makes it seem VERY REAL. Yep, we must be getting married, I'm having a wedding shower! I know it's going to be a great day, and I'm really looking forward to seeing everybody. It's going to be a tea party, which is pretty much perfect, as far as I'm concerned.

What else? We'll be looking for a vintage suit for Kevan, and we'll go fabric shopping for my dress and hopefully leave with a completed frock! We'll probably also take a look at shoes and various other wedding outfit and party accoutrements. We'll spend some time addressing and mailing the invites, if they're ready in time for us to take with us, that is. Otherwise, we'll be looking at a plan B for them. Heh. And, of course, I'll be spending some time writing thank you notes to my shower attendees. Honestly? I can't wait!

Frequently Asked Questions

2006-06-17T08:39:00.000-07:00

Q: What kind of wedding is this, anyhow?

A: We're glad you asked. We're planning a swanky cocktail party at which we'll just happen to get married. You should aim to arrive at FRED around 7pm. Enjoy a festive cocktail or softdrink, take in the sights, listen to the music, sign our guestbook. We'll be along at 7:30 to tie the knot. Afterward, our fabulous gypsy jazz band will play, hors d'oeuvres will be served, and the good times will be allowed to roll! We'll slip away, with our families, for a few minutes for photos, and then we'll be right back in the thick of it with you.

Q: FRED...who's that?

A: Good question. Fred is our hairstylist, if you can believe that, and FRED is his salon.

Q: Wait a minute...you're getting hitched in a hair salon?!?

A: No, that's where we'll go for the photos. This isn't just any hair salon. This is a hair salon slash cafe slash gallery. It's a beautiful place with great food and fantastic art. It's in our neighbourhood and we often stop in there for coffee or lunch or, you know, a perfect haircut. We're really excited about having our wedding there.

Q: So what should I wear to this shindig?

A: As Stephanie told Kevan, it doesn't matter what you wear, as long as you're clothed. Steph will be wearing a somewhat floofy tea-length dress and Kevan is aiming for a vintage suit. You should wear whatever you feel fabulous or comfortable in, whichever matters most to you. Or hey, if you can find something that makes you feel both those things...well, that's great! There will be some chairs and tables and comfy lounge furniture, but as per the cocktail party style, there won't be a seat for everyone at all times...so you might want to wear shoes that won't hobble you. Steph will undoubtedly be in flip-flops by night's end.

Q: Is there dinner at this thing?

A: No, this is more of a post-dinner affair. We will have some delicious hors d'oeuvres on hand though, and Steph's sister is making some of her famous grapeleaves, and Kev's mom is making some of her famous fatayers. So there'll be delicious bites served throughout the evening.

Q: Are you two crazy kids registered anywhere?

A: Matter of fact we are. We’re registered at Sears, where you can access our registry online if you like, or right in the store. We’re also registered at Williams-Sonoma at Sherway Gardens in Mississauga…no online registry available there. And finally, for the things we need that Sears simply does not have, we are newly registered at Home Outfitters, where you can find our registry in store or online. We are also perpetually renovating our 140-year-old house (we spend A LOT of time at Home Depot), fixing up our equally old garden, and we’re saving for the first leg of our everlasting honeymoon (awww, Kevan's all squishy about these things!), hopefully next spring.

Q: Halifax seems like a cool place. What’s to do there?

A: Halifax IS a cool place. There’s tonnes of stuff to do here. Some of our favourite things to do include: a visit to the Farmers’ Market on Saturday morning between 7am and 1pm; a trip out along the St Margaret’s Bay Road to browse for antiques, hang out on Queensland Beach and have a lobster supper at the Shore Club; a walk along the boardwalk; a stroll through Point Pleasant Park or the Public Gardens; dropping in to Steve-O-Reno’s for coffee; going out for a drink to one of Halifax’s many fine establishments; Sunday brunch; a jaunt to the Hydrostone…there’s tonnes of great stuff to do here. Did I say that already? There’s also a casino, if you’re feeling lucky. And always LOTS of fab live music to check out.

Q: You guys have crazy weather out there…don’t you?

A: Affirmative. But October is usually pretty gorgeous. A few years ago, Thanksgiving weekend was so hot, we went swimming in the ocean. But you just never know in this place, because, well, the ocean. So check the Weather Network before you jump on the plane, and definitely pack with layers in mind.

How to get here, and where to stay once you do

2006-06-04T12:35:00.000-07:00

If you're travelling to Halifax from out of town, thank you so much! We can hardly wait to see you, and we're honoured that you'd spend some of your hard-earned vacation time to come and celebrate with us.

We've made some arrangements at a pair of local hotels for you out-of-towners.

For those who are budget-conscious and don't mind a small hotel with few frills, there's The Commons Inn. It's just steps from our front door, and about three blocks from FRED, our fabulous wedding venue. They're holding a block of rooms for us until early September. You can call them at 1 877 797 7999, or email infor@commonsinn.ca, and tell them you'd like to book a room for the Domet Event (sounds ominous, doesn't it?).

We've also got a block reservation at the Holiday Inn Select at Quinpool and Robie. The rooms and services there are very nice, and the hotel is about a five-dollar cab ride…or a 15-minute walk, if the weather's fine…from the wedding venue. To receive the special rate, you'll need to book by Friday, September 8, 2006. There's no booking code; you just say you're with the Domet-Corbett wedding (eee!). You can book by calling (902) 423-1161, or toll free at 1-888-810-7288 or by fax at (902) 423-9069.

You can find general information about visiting Nova Scotia, including accommodation information for those who plan to spend some time outside of Halifax here.

If you're planning to build a vacation around our wedding (we think that's a great idea!) there's plenty to see and do in and around Halifax. If you're hoping to spend a few days by the ocean, you might consider staying in Hubbards, which is about a 40 minute drive from Halifax, and is lovely. (We're happy to answer any questions you might have about what to see, where to stay and what to do, or to at least point you in the right direction.)

There are also a few bed and breakfasts in our neighbourhood. We haven't stayed in any of them because, well, we've got both bed and breakfast available to us right here at home. But do check out the Garden View Bed and Breakfast which looks absolutely lovely and is close to everything, including our place. The Fountain View Guest House gets mixed reviews online (some love the proprietor, some not so much), but its rates are unbeatable ($25 a night, it seems) and it is very close to our house, downtown, and the wedding venue.

Now, as to how to get here. If you're planning to drive, it'll take you roughly 18 hours from Toronto. We do that drive all the time, and we quite enjoy it -- in fact, we got engaged last year on just such a drive, in room 448 of the Quality Inn in Edmunston...give our regards, if you stay there! Mapquest offers great driving directions. You'll need to pay two tolls, both in Nova Scotia. It's four bucks to drive on the Cobequid Pass, and 75 cents to cross the bridge from Dartmouth into Halifax.

If you're flying, you'll be landing at the beautiful Halifax International Airport. It's about 30 minutes to town from the airport.
If you're planning to rent a car, there are six or seven car rental companies to choose from at the airport (all the major ones are represented there, and will let you make reservations online or over the phone in advance. Again, you'll need 75 cents to cross the bridge into Halifax, and they'll be able to provide you with directions. Cab and limo service is available, at a cost of about $50, and there's an airport shuttle, for about $25 round trip. But do let us know when you're arriving at the airport--we should be able to pick you up, or delegate someone to do so! (If you're planning to stick around for a vacation, it's nice to have a car, since the province is very drive-able and there are lots of fun things to do within a day's drive of Halifax.)

If you have questions about how to get here, where to stay, or what to do once you're here, and you can't find the answers you seek online, please email stephandkev at ns dot sympatico dot ca or call us, and we'd be happy to help you sort it out.

Did we mention we can't wait to see you?

How we met: A love story

2006-04-12T11:38:00.000-07:00

Well, that’s a funny story. We actually met about 10 years ago, around the time each of us moved to Halifax. You wouldn’t call it love at first sight. Kevan claims the first meeting was at the Café Mokka, a dark and smokey bar where Steph used to run a reading series called Oral Fixation—though Stephanie doesn’t remember this at all. She remembers the bar and the reading series, but not meeting Kevan there. Kevan asked Stephanie something about her writing, and Stephanie, still fresh from Toronto, gave him some attitude. And a beautiful rivalry was born. Stephanie thought Kevan was a dork. Kevan thought Steph was a snob. Each was right in their own way.

And that’s where the story would have ended. But on or around June 20, 2003, The Coast, Halifax’s weekly newspaper, in the office of which Stephanie misspent most of her 20s, had a big party. Steph was there. So was Kevan. So was a lot of vodka. Putting aside dorkery and snobitude, the two began chatting. Kevan put his hand in Steph’s hair and said, “Wow, I wish I could get my hair to do that.” Seductive, no? Steph grabbed Kev’s leather jacket and said, “Yeah, are you gonna kiss me, or what?” Kev smiled and said, “Oh, I’ll kiss you.” And kiss her he did. And the rest is history: the longest summer fling ever on record. And perhaps the only one ever to end in matrimony.

I dream of bridezilla

2006-02-13T23:43:00.000-08:00

I have become obsessed. Not so much with the wedding planning, because...well, see earlier post about how uncomplicated things are for us. No, I have become obsessed with Etiquette Hell and Going Bridal. Can't. Stop. Reading. Will I eventually freak out and go bridal? Hard to say. I am pretty organised. And stubborn. And I really like to get my way. I believe in compromise, of course, especially if someone is compromising to make me happy. Sounds like a Bridezilla to be, to be sure.

But no. First of all, Kevan would pack up his guitars and various percussive instruments and leave me so fast it'd make my big tulle skirt spin. Second of all, I'd attempt to leave me, too. And then things would just get complicated. We're all about 1. the party, and 2. the marriage. The wedding? It'll be fun, but it's not the be-all and end-all. We both know that. And so does any latent Bridezilla who might be lurking within.

It is an exercise in compromise though, this wedding planning, and as such is perfect rehearsal for a life of compromise. A life of learning to work it out, to find a middle ground that works for both of us. Or to learn to let things go now and again to please your partner. It's not like these are new concepts to us, necessarily. We're pretty good at looking out for each other's happiness. But it is instructive to have an ongoing workshop int he stuff, you know?

Wedding work I've done lately has amounted to a trip to the stationery store, and then one to the art supply store. I bought a single bright green postcard size piece of cardstock, a bright green small Chinese takeout style box and a small bright green ink pad. Do you sense a theme emerging? More like a colour scheme, actually. I don't think bright green really qualifies as a theme. Anyhow. We decided in short order that printing the invite postcards on bright green cardstock will be a hassle and will make us look like martians in the line drawing we're intending to use on the invites; that the takeout style box is too expensive as a vessel for our bonbonniere and (according to Kevan) too trendy; and that we probably won't have much occasion to stamp stuff. Although...I will work on finding some stuff to stamp. Because stamping is fun. And the ink is bright green! What is not to like about that, I ask you?

Nothing, Bridezilla, nothing!

Still here, still engaged

2006-01-19T13:36:00.000-08:00

Oh, you poor, neglected wedding blog, you. No sooner set up than abandoned. It's just that...the wedding is not going to be very complicated, and so, neither are the preparations. Which means there ain't much to tell you.

However, that doesn't seem very sporting, does it? Here's a link to our registry, for interest's sake.

What else can I tell you? Here's where the planning stands:

Date: chosen. Sunday, October 8, 2006.
Venue: booked. Whet cafe gallery, Agricola Street, Halifax.
Rings: picked out. The Arctic Landscape ring.
Reception: decided on. Cocktail party style with, we hope, a gypsy jazz band.
Dress: mostly decided on. In keeping with our "we're not big white wedding people" theme, I'm leaning pretty heavily toward a green, cocktail length, halter neck dress. The exact green is a bit vague right now, and I haven't even looked at fabric. But a friend of Kevan's offered to make the dress in exchange for drum lessons. Yes, she is a dressmaker, and yes, she was a little tipsy when she offered. But I love her work, and would be delighted if she were to make the dress. That said, the wedding isn't for more than nine months. Since that's all the time you need to make a human, I figure there's no need to start the dress now, as a dress is a good bit less complicated than a creature. And no, I am not pregnant. I am merely trying to be illustrative.

And that's where things stand right now. Oh yeah, invitations: we're hoping to go postcard style. One of our favourite local artists did a quick charcoal sketch of us at a fundraiser before Christmas, and I think that's what we're going to use for our invites. I suppose I should look into printing them and all that.

If I'm not the laziest bride ever, I pity her, whoever she is.

The bride'll be the one carrying the Sears-blue handbag

2005-11-18T20:19:00.000-08:00

Hey there!

Thanks for coming to our wedding....uh, blog.

For those of you who haven't met me, I'm Stephanie, the distaff member of Kephanie...Hollywood's newest power couple. Today, we acted like an engaged couple, and went to Sears to register. That was weird. They handed Kevan the scanning gun (practically the only experience in this whole wedding industrial complex that's actually targeted to the guy) and set us free upon the housewares section. And lo, verily, did we rampage! We'll post a link to the registry in the next day or two...it took us a while to figure out the gun, and we ended up scanning a bunch of crap. Heh. So we'll just edit it up nice and post it for all y'all. The whole shooting match took about three hours, and at the end, they presented me with a rectangular, plastic-canvas handbag in the distinctive Sears colours of navy blue and white, but a la Hermes, with a handle made from a piece of rope encased in rubber tubing. Very this season, very now. Inside, I found a copy of Today's Bride magazine and a how-to folder on registering. You'd think they'd give you the how-to before they just hand you over a gun...

Then we went to Whet (I'd post a link but...they don't seem to have a website), which is a fantastic gallery-cafe-salon down the street from our house. We're planning to do the deed there...get hitched, that is. So today we met with the co-owner, Joel, to talk logistics and the like. We're really looking forward to throwing a big party there.

Which is where you come in. Here are the deets as they stand at this time: We're getting married on October 8, 2006. It's the Sunday of Thanksgiving weekend.
Uh.
Those are the deets as they stand at this time. If you're reading this page, there's a real good chance you're invited.